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August 31 cozy day...<3 今天(或是算昨天啦) 跟了好久不見的朋友聚了餐 真的好開心阿～ 很棒的氣氛 很少有的感受 好久沒體會到 一種屬於自己世界的空間 彷彿周遭的一切 都無關緊要 被fast forward了 時間 被我們停留 歡樂的氣氛 不被散去 想想 跟wa&hong認識應該有..四年了！！？ 哈哈 真是時光飛逝阿 想起當初 挺好笑的 念著ESL的課程 認識來自四面八方的學生們 組起了自己的小團體 我們- 亞洲來的 靠著對相同音樂態度的喜歡 熱絡起來 說實話 認識不久時 還真分不出誰是誰呢 沒錯、 他們是雙胞胎 屌吧！ 其實 說有像也有像 不像也不像 很妙 很共通的 都是很好相處的好人 聽過有人說這裡香港人很難相處 我覺得我真的很幸運 都遇到好人 那段時間 真的好快樂阿 有屬於自己的圈子 ESL結束後 大家各奔東西 朝自己的目標前進 那時 當自己覺得終於找到一個知心時 她卻必須離開美國 回韓國去了 親愛的Gina miss u still. u were a great friend!! 當圈圈中少了自己親近的 就慢慢脫節了 變成一個孤僻的人 越來越distant myself 然後變成現在的自己.. 真的很感謝這兩位阿  都還記得我的存在 在這來來去去的世界裡 大家都是藝術份子(寫出來挺好笑的..) 都是對art有很深深的興趣 在這有氣質的p-town 對不同的領域 懷抱著夢想前進著 一個中了台灣音樂的毒 一個中了台灣政治的毒 很搞笑.. 聽他們講話 帶著特定的腔調 很奇妙 我幾乎都聽的懂 覺得普通話講的很好了！！ 但其他台灣人似乎就沒我這麼有天份啦.. 只是我廣東話可是幾乎完全聽不懂 哈哈哈 跟他們聊天真的很好玩 也很開心 很久不見了 hong在ken離開前見了一次 選在koji聚餐 這次也是 只差一個桌子就同桌了 這次是在我離開前(雖然不是不回來了！！) 吃的很開心 聊的很開心 在他們關門前 決定三個成年人去hapy hour一下 真的 很久沒去happy hour了 在dm離開之後... 喝了dm會喝的東西 三個人 聊開來 天氣雖冷 心是暖和的！ 朋友給的溫馨 一定要好好記住 感謝你們的請客 多謝了！！！  回來帶好吃的給你們 哈哈哈 說到朋友 最近好不容易在工作那時認識的一個 似乎也要離開這裡 轉回NY去了 怎麼 我好不容易找到的知心 總是離我而去? 這裡指的 都是女生輩兼年齡相近的 我室友是人很好的 不要誤會 只是不是我自己出去找出來的 感覺不太一樣 yuki 是很帥氣的一個NY jp人 很喜歡她 所以即使決定要回去 我也會祝福她的 至少以後要去ny玩時 會有靠山 呵呵 心情真的很high (跟酒沒關！"騙誰阿...") 照了臉紅通通的自拍 突然決定要來玩一下ps (部份原因是因為床很亂 想混淆視覺 哈!) 雖然都是preset的filter 但還是很好玩 純粹自娛用 很喜歡 兩種風格 August 29 what a day! people say life is full of surprises!! how true!!! yesterday was UNBELIEVABLE!! very exciting, i may say but not in a good way. shocking incidents just keep coming.. good and bad... oh my, thank god my heart is in good shape. 從要在三天內搬走 到處處打聽哪裡有地方住 到租了倉庫來寄放傢具 後瞬間又可以多留兩個禮拜 到花了約枉錢退倉庫約 最後是找一間可以盡快搬的地方 woke up by my roommate's series of panic knock on the door although i was already woken by someone who dared to call- at freaking 6 in the morning! (yeah, u know who!)twice!! and luckily the sun's out and shining so i wasn't in bad mood BUT the shocking news definitely woke me completely!!! turned out, we need to move out by the end of this month- which is Sunday, 8/31/2008, and that's in three days. and we had NO AWARE of that, AT ALL!!! OMG!!! we suddenly have so much need to worry about time, place, how, when, what??!! WHAT??!!! hold it! how did that happen, u may ask. i can only say, always read letters from landlord more than once! so i had to cancel my plan to visit my beloved IKEA and find an available apt to move, ASAP! since i had no idea how to fight 4 my rights i had to call for help, my mighty army-dm, bro, and yuki. called dm first see if he could ask for some extension. and text bro and yuki to brainstorm some alternatives basically and cry out for help and yes, i was thinking "fxck! i'm so screwed rite now!" cuz my roommate still had midterm to get to i was at home, believe it or not, watching tv. i just couldn't thinking 'bout it; otherwise, i'd go crazy. on people. my idea(and yuki's too) was renT a storage, find a place to stay. i'm leaving on the 6th. so as long as i have place to put my stuff i don't have much to worry about. but what about my roommate? she needs a place to stay- until we find a new place and god knows how long. so we decided to look around nearby area and found two. at least we can have some place to live soon. now needs to worry about all the crap we have in the house, or.. i have anyway cuz 97% are my crap. ha-ha. i'm almost done w/ my room, and livingroom+kitchen shouldn't b too bad either. And oh btw, we just cleand and rearranged the house YESTERDAY! huh, all for nothing maybe... so anyway, after visitng the website for the nearby P.S. and u-haul we went to the storage to see if there's any available unit for rent one. figured we can move small stuff ourselves first so we signed the lease, paid for it, reeady to go now.. BUT BUT BUT!! just about when we started to use it(put our lock on) dm called. and gave us the shicking good news, at the wrong time. we can stay until the 14th. two more weeks for us!! IF! if he called just 1,2 mins earlier, we wouldn't have rented it ended up losing thirty-something dollars to cancel the deal. all i can say, 花錢消災 花錢消災. so now, thanks to dm, we have a little more time to pack and move. (really really appreciated dm's help!!!!  )but now i have problems!! so.. what about my stuff?? like i said before, i'm leaving on the 6th. no, i won't be here to move my stuff!!!!!! and of all people i know here (2 maybe?? this is sad..) my bro is the only one that can help now. cuz dm's not here. and no, i don't have other ppl to turn to. the only good thing out of all this, is that i'm leaing soon. get away from all these painful experiences. it's kinda ironic isn't it? cuz i'm leaving, i don't have to face all these and also cuz i'm leaving, i need to face all these. Wow! what the F just happened!!? drama drama drama! ups and downs, come and go.. and now, i can't sleep. why? cuz i started to worry about other small stuff now. had been asking questions around, even from taiwan. NICE!!! I LOVE MY FAMILY!!! so thanks for everyone who helped me today- dm, bro in tw, bro in or, yuki, mr.lai, my roommate-mi. it's 3 in the morning.. shit! i need to go to bed... people, wish me luck!!! August 24 ㄘㄨㄚ、的莫名其妙 as titled. 實在不是很確定今天到底怎樣了 只能說.. 考完就是完全的relief 緊張到誇張 說話發抖結巴 打字錯字連篇 聽說讀寫 正常時一切 no problem. 誰知坐到冷冰冰的象牙白電腦前 out of control. 想當初面對真人時的IKEA interview 偶而的um, well... yet still remained conscious. but almost completely blacked out today couldn't think straight nor speak calm or write normal all i can say, NOT NORMAL!! how can this determine my level????????? so not fair. i panicked, got distracted, and guessed my answer. NOT GOOD! had a nervous breakdown last nite, totally freaked out had to call my parents had to talk to someone who can calm me after two-three words, i burst into tears couldn't help it how long it's been since last time i cried- for something other than love. must had shocked them too cuz i heard surprised in their voices never realized how much i need them until that moment the warmth feeling from family, simple as that couldn't hold in anymore, my pressure needed out then i cried for a while until i felt calm (but honestly, i wasn't really calm. didn't get a goodnite sleep) still way too nervous when i got there, when i signed in when i talked, when i sat, when i finished first half of the test when i used the bathroom, when i started again, not until i was out of that place! that atmosphere froze me wasn't cold, but my nails turned purple. 考完時 出了大大太陽 接觸到新鮮空氣 心松了... 享受了乾哥買的green tea frappuccino 讚哪！！ 整個人突然就像free了一樣 沒有負擔 心情大好 說說笑笑 逛了街 看了電影 吃了好久沒吃到的水餃加糖醋排骨 又一讚！！ 真的很妙 就像變了一個人一樣 一個正常的自己 總是笑的很爽的那個我 沒想到阿沒想到 壓力對我的影響如此大 更沒想到的是竟然有壓力 連自己都覺得好笑 不過說真的 不是第一次考托福 但感覺像要世界末日一樣 不能自己 total 4hrs 考的我頭昏腦脹 眼花撩亂阿～～ 每次看到題目出現時 想的竟然是怎麼還有阿 沒完沒了 考到想放棄投降的程度.. 不想去想了 總算結束了！！ 感謝所有分享&承受我瘋狂的人- 爹娘小米乾哥 especially 即使擔心緊張並沒有消失或減少 但至少我有人可以聊聊講講 特別感謝乾哥就是了！ 很久沒見到他 總是忙東忙西的 因為要早去所以他沒睡 真是辛苦了！ 還要帶我去 陪我晃 消磨時間 聽我發牢騷 ^^" 早知道就叫他"陪考"了 哈哈哈哈哈～ 總之 多謝了老大！辛苦你了！！！  August 21 神清氣爽 ^^ 今天起了個大早 上了網跟PSU的人做了online chat 挺好笑的 看到大家的問題.. 不過有個白癡 問了一堆很蠢的問題 然後突然提到他自己的托福成績 X的！！高的要命！ 119/120...然後還自己說everything30/30 except speaking.. 當場真的很想把他推去撞牆！！！然後踩扁他～～  想到前一天在做測試時 整個人差點瘋狂掉 開始對自己有懷疑 不確定 然後情緒猛然低落了整晚 相當擔心自己過不了... 還差點要哭咧～ 原本想出門 但是飄了毛毛雨 真是天公不做美！ 窩在家裡 不知所措 真是很down............. 發誓今天一定要出去走走！！ 然後 真的 感謝老天爺！！！！  今天天氣真是不錯耶 有涼 但也有小太陽 整體相當舒服 portland的秋天氣息 棒呆了！！ 下午兩點決定要出門去 去個target挑戰看看 沒自己去過 然後也可以順便去washington square瞧瞧 散散心 逛街真的很可以紓解不快樂 左走走 右晃晃 不知不覺三小時過去了 誰知道出來時 還出了個大太陽 溫暖舒適的曬在身上 覺得煩惱都被蒸發掉一樣 回家的路上 風輕輕吹 懶洋洋的走在路上 真的是 台北不會有的輕鬆～～ 不知是否因為心情放鬆了 覺得整個人也變光彩了點 喜歡今天的自己 頭髮 衣服 打扮 淡淡妝 休閒又可愛 哈哈哈 回到家 看到自己 超喜歡今天的頭髮的^^ 然後就興起自拍的衝動了 很久沒拍了說... 真是越拍越爽 哈哈 連自己都覺得爆笑的程度了 勉強自己停下來 不然真的很誇張 這次 把我的新寶貝-hippo也入鏡了  開心 今天 真的 很開心 後天 就是定生死的日子了！！ 希望 可以不要太緊張 太擔心 太慌張 保持 今天的grace 平平靜靜 一步一步的解決難題 順其自然吧 加油!! go ME!!! 分享hippo的可愛給大家 August 18 get away 孤單 哪來的? 為什麼有時有 有時又沒有 最近 突然發現 似乎跟自己周遭有關係 要是一直都是一個人 並不會感到孤單 只有無聊 要是眼中有一對一對的幸福couple出現 孤單就現形 眼中會不自覺的有羨慕 腦中不自覺的有回想 為什麼 這時的自己 是一個人孤零零 看到別人幸福快樂 是很溫馨的一件事 只是當下一個人 必須孤單承受充滿空氣的幸福 我一點也不怕一個人 也不怕無聊 世界上有網路有電視有音樂有家 只是 當幸福的笑聲不斷出現在身邊 再堅強的人 也不能控制自己不去想.. why and how 乾笑自己 連續不斷的看著電視 直到累倒自己 body and soul 並不是在抱怨什麼 因為一個人有一個人的快樂 而是對呼吸太多幸福空氣感到unbearable 想要抒發 想要喘口氣 想要逃離... |
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